Updated: Jun 2
When I was in my early teens, my mother was told by a doctor and a dentist who didn’t know each other that I had an unusually large opening in my throat. They both said that this usually meant a voice that would be strong and powerful, especially for singing. My parents gave me singing lessons and my teachers confirmed it. I loved singing and knew that this was what I was destined to do in my life.
I also experienced a series of events, starting with sexual trauma from my 3rd grade teacher, who made me believe that it was my fault and I had to keep quiet about it or my parents would punish me for it. I did what I was told, quieting my speaking voice from expressing to others what I was feeling.
As time went on, this all led to the development of what became my inner critic who continued to feed me lies that there was something innately wrong with me, that I wasn’t good enough, that I was never working hard enough. I also continued to keep what I was feeling to myself.
And the belief patterns from those lies continued to repeat themselves in all areas of my life as I got older – friendships, romantic partners, finances…it all just kept showing up everywhere, sabotaging me from achieving and being successful and happy in what I wanted in life.
I did continue to sing through all of this, still believing it to be my life calling; but the dream of singing and performing in front of millions of people became dimmer and dimmer as my focus turned more to finding answers on how to resolve this inner negativity and find peace.
I began studying several different modern body/mind integration healing techniques and became an authorized acupressure teacher and practitioner and a voice specialist in singing, speaking and sound healing. I also explored the Native American spiritual tradition, becoming a Ceremonialist, especially in helping women to connect to the Divine Feminine through an ancient moon ceremony. It all helped, but that inner critic continued to be stubborn and persistent, also creating a chronic pattern of stress and tightness in my body, and I kept searching.
I found what I was looking for 30’s years ago, that started a journey that has continued into today, with the Ancient Hawaiian Wisdom that is called Living Aloha. It started with learning Hula, their Sacred Dance. Hula is also ancient storytelling through movement, with the stories embodying the message of Living Aloha.
As I experienced the fluidity and flow of Hula, I found my body finally unwinding and letting go. I felt more grounded in it, and I could move and dance freely again. I also became passionate about sharing hula with other women, for them to have this same experience of healing and transformation through hula as I had. In learning about Living Aloha – a system of loving kindness, compassion, joy and acceptance, I felt I had finally come home.
Over the years I have studied with master Teachers of both Hula and Hawaiian Spirituality here on the Mainland and through numerous trips to Hawai’i.
My most recent teacher has been Kumu Mahealani Kuamo’o Henry, a Kanaka Maoli (Native Hawaiian). She shares the ancient teachings of the original Hawaiian people, and a very different way to live in this world and to finally quiet that inner critic. It is called Ho’opono Pono Ke Ala – “to make what is already right more right, the path” - and is rooted in the Aloha Spirit.
It holds the belief that we come into this life as Spiritual Beings who have chosen to be involved in this human experience to grow and evolve more in our Spiritual Greatness, with the “wonderful opportunities” we have in our human interactions with each other to help us in that growth.
Now I knew the truth of what I had always “felt” – that this western fault-finding mindset most of us have been brought up in is only one way of seeing the world. There is another way. We can choose instead to embrace our innate goodness - to love ourselves, quiet that inner critic, listen instead to our inner guidance and use our voice to speak our truth with confidence and grace.
These ancient teachings of Ho’opono Pono Ke Ala have been the final piece in my own transformation and in bringing together what I do as a spiritual mentor and life coach to women. I am very grateful for all that I have learned on this life-journey of healing, bringing me to where I am today – and I am still singing, also sharing the message of Aloha now through my songs!
If you or anyone you know is struggling in Freeing Your True Voice, I would love to speak with you in a 45 minute session to help you discover the 5 things holding them back and the #1 thing they can do to Step Into Their Greatness. Just visit my website for the link to schedule it. www.TheHeartofAloha.com
Aloha Pono! Kaleo