On Friday afternoon, Phil and I waited at the airport with leis in hand, anticipating the arrival of his parents. Their trip out here to the islands has been a longtime in the making and one that almost didn't happen, so finally meeting up with them at baggage claim was a happy, joyful moment.
Last June, I wrote this post in honor of Father's Day and mentioned that my Father-in-Law (FIL) was recovering from a recent stroke; it has taken a year and half before it was decided he was finally well enough to travel, so this trip is a pretty big, celebratory deal.
However. In the seventy-two hours since they've been here, I have wanted to cry more times than I can count. My FIL suffered a major stroke which affected not just his mobility, but language and memory as well. It's been an arduous year and a half of therapy visits and hard work on his part, and the progress he has made during this time is nothing short of amazing. I'm happy to have them here and feel incredibly blessed that we are still able to enjoy this special time together; when I look at my FIL and see his kind eyes smiling back at me, my heart swells...but I miss him. I miss hearing his voice and listening to his wise words and sage advice. Having him here and hugging him is the same, but it is also very different.
Phil and I have had a number of age-related revelations, one of the glaringly obvious being our parents' mortality. We are now at a point in our lives where we see our parents through different eyes; no longer do we see them as the authoritative figures we were anxious to separate ourselves from, but instead, as vulnerable beings we find ourselves worrying about. This role-reversal and fear? It's consuming, but there is a comfort in knowing that it is also a rite of passage in each of our journeys. Today, I am feeling so blessed that we still have this time together. Call or visit your parent(s); make their day today.
Regarding my last post; I didn't realize the tone might have led you to believe I was planning on shutting down the blog (not a chance), so I wanted to clarify that I am only looking to change my own expectations here. I needed to re-evaluate the direction and my desire for this blog without compromising its original purpose and intent. So, for those of you who commented or sent me kind emails letting me know your thoughts, thank you...thank you for reading along! I'm still here, and I'm still writing. xo
Getting older can sure suck ;) I am faced with mortality of a parent almost daily and it is rough stuff. Love to you.
ReplyDeleteI am there with my parents and it is so tough. I feel that shift. I am glad your FIL was feeling up to the trip. That time together is precious.
ReplyDeleteHope you both enjoy this time with Phil's parents!
ReplyDeleteThis is such a sweet post and I am so happy that you are able to spend time with Phils parents. It does make me sad, though, and reminds me to take more time to love my parents.
ReplyDeleteSo happy to hear that Phil's parents were able to make it out for a visit. Loved this post xo
ReplyDeleteI know just what you mean about seeing your parents through different eyes. Its...sad. over the year, I've been seeing my parents through different eyes and then when my dad has his heart attack in January, oh my gosh, it was such a horrible eye opener. :(
ReplyDeleteI hope you're able to enjoy every minute you have with them.
Emily at Amazing Grapes
Beautiful post. I am working with a stroke patient right now as part of my clinical work for speech-path and I love their dedication and determination to improve. It's so inspiring every day. I passed along a blog award to you this morning :) have a fantastic day.
ReplyDeleteThe leis are beautiful. I hope you guys are enjoying your visit with your family, and what a blessing that your FIL could travel. I've lost my own father, but a good friend was just telling me the other day this same stuff...it's hard to see your parents this way. It's a true role-reversal. Hugs and enjoy their visit!
ReplyDeleteHope all is well. Have missed chatting with you.
xo.
I'm so glad they were able to come and be with you (maybe they still are, not quite sure). And I hear you on parent's mortality. It's a hard pill to swallow, especially when they've seemed so strong for so long. It sounds like your'e doing it right - loving the best way you know how. Hang in there!
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