I feel it again. It happens this time every year, after another birthday and the ritualistic reflection leaves me feeling particularly pensive about the past and its effect on my future---our future.
It is a process I go through every year; that elusive shift in perspective where I find myself surveying my life, sometimes critically, but still, always...searching.
This year was no different. I suppose it is only natural to feel slightly narcissistic on one's birthday, when, afterall, it is supposed to be the one day a year when it is "all about you". But I am finding that with each year that passes, these "birth" days have become less about wreckless celebration and more about introspection and curiosity and rumination and the incessant desire to just GROW. To lift my face towards the sun and God, to reach upwards with a sense of purpose and conviction that I feel deep in my heart.
I've been brewing a deeper post over the last few days but haven't really had the energy to sit down and bang it out. But I'm getting there. Tonight, The Hubs and I just needed some time to breathe. We are back from dinner and having just dropped the last of our visiting friends off at the airport to catch a flight back to San Francisco. It has been a crazy-hectic three weeks, and I am E-X-H-A-U-S-T-E-D.
So the post will have to wait.